before caring got bored

it's that the key (and 88 links {and even more references to songs and people and experiences and events and so on and so forth and you know the rest} could easily be placed right here said the piano man), when the caring was real, before it got bored, there was no need for a god or a lord, when caring was real, before love was a prize, there was no need to close your eyes... when caring was real, there was no fear or shame, love was not a negotiation or game, when caring was real, before it got bored, caring was valued and never ignored... so much is forgotten, so much is ignored, so much was lost when caring got bored...

when caring was real

there were people, once upon a time, who cared for real... i mean, time would pass and we would fall out of touch for years and we'd get back together and care, help, share, and be true friends as we were when we were first best of friends... there are few who reach that bond and i have been lucky to know some... two have birthdays today, barb and ray... two would would embrace the bored and continue caring...

let the songs play... wish you were here :)

if you find the connections

they you may find me, though this blog was not meant to connect with the written gardens nearly as much as others did and yet, as it finds it's place and voice, perhaps the paths will lay themselves out without planning as it happens in the gardens when they grow naturally... alone again, too... naturally, that is... let my people go, and all that... what i mean is, what i want is, what i need is, love, love love (happy birthday john), love is all we need... unless, of course, you don't want to share the greatest feeling life can offer, in which case, all you need is food and water and protection from the elements and predators to survive... of, and air, are without be helpful... unless you don't care if you survive, in which case you don't need much (but i know i love you)... basically, this is also a distraction from the madness of loneliness and despair that can come from it when sharing is what is wanted... for me, at least, when i want to share, that is...

for the bored and the caring, the words sigh...

and narf too...

the despair goes here?

maybe that's the reason for this blog as if every blog has a reason like every book has a theme and every cliche has a place in this world so all i need to do is find mine but until i do i can stumble into despair and this may be where it comes now (it's been a long time since we had a place for despair if you if you know what i mean or remember the beginnings (though the first online despairs were deleted by AT&T when they decided to deleted web pages even though i was still paying for web space, but that's another reason for despair of a different color) and so it goes (and you're the only one who knows)...

whatever, aye?...

nobody

feeling so blue, so down, so lost in depressing thoughts, so alone, so alone... feeling so sad, so miserably stripped of any hope of redeeming any trust in this life and a life without trust is a lonely empty life, a life without trust is a knife that cuts a heart out without trust there's only doubt, without trust life is a trap with no way out, no way out, just one way out...

being nobody...

life floats by

yes, there is a life behind the words, a person between the lines, a reality within the story and whether you are the bored or the caring, you will only know if you ask (if you recall, ya know?) and then explore the answers you receive (can you receive?)... deeper and deeper we spiral back deeper and deeper into the past to the beginning (and beyond where it all began)... the simplicity of the record of a life and all that grows from it... what?... where?... when?... huh who wah la dah dee dah... lololol (or something like that)... startling, isn't it?... or perhaps you are just as nonchalantly amused as i, as life floats by...

what matters

it doesn't matter if nobody comes here and nobody reads this and nobody notices that i am here... it doesn't matter if everyone is bored and i am ignored and it looks and feels like nobody is there... it doesn't matter if nobody cares... it doesn't matter if nobody shares... it doesn't matter if it doesn't matter... what?...

what?... the bored have their say, m'ok?...

narf :P

people

why do people feel the need to put other people down?
making fun of each other as if they have no feelings
no empathy at all

so two married men are sitting and talking with a single girl
and the men tell each other how the girl does nothing for them
is that really necessary?

as if the girl has no feelings
as if she was coming on to them
as if she was even interested
and they want to believe
they weren't trying to hurt her

why do people feel the need to put other people down?
making fun of each other as if they have no feelings
no empathy at all

so two married women ask a single guy for directions
and the women laugh at the man's pot belly and tell the guy "you wish"
is that really necessary?

as if the guy has no feelings
as if he was coming on to them
as if he was even interested
and they want to believe
they weren't trying to hurt him

why do people feel the need to put other people down?
making fun of each other as if they have no feelings
no empathy at all

are the single ones such a threat to their relationships
that they have to go on the offensive
even when the single ones are not coming on at all?

are the married ones so shut down that they have no empathy?
why do they think it's funny
to help another fall?

why do people feel the need to put other people down?
making fun of each other as if they have no feelings
no empathy at all

kinda sad

and the music leads me to remember amidst the bliss of the celebration of life and being in the moment, some things are missing... it has been so long since the child inside was set free to come out to play without any set rules or inhibitions, i mean completely free of self-consciousness in the pure innocence only the child knows and can actualize... and it has been even longer since someone cared enough to help give the child that freedom for a while, a day, an hour, a moment, by being 'parent' or best friend and pulling the child back from the edge if we bounced too close to upsetting the grown up world... so long since the unconditional trust was actualized... so long since the child took the wheel and let go of all the fears and inhibitions... so long since the letting go... lonely...

sad, actually...

Free embed music player from ReverbNation.com

more anika

remember

the bored and the caring may find me, and hopefully one will understand... and caring enough to remind me, of the dreams i once had planned... to love and be loved forever, to share everything with the one, to know the moment is eternal, and we always have just begun... always only just beginning... living in the moment is as real as it gets... may i never stop caring, may i never forget... and may we share someday...

ridiculous drama

and when i ask who cares it doesn't matter who answers if i don't... and when i give it all away and let things spiral out of control and feel helpless it is only ridiculous drama i create within my mind... when will i learn to be silent... when will i remember who i am... when will i stop the idle babble... when will i stop wasting my hand... who cares, right?... what matters even more is... who understands?...

lonely times

i can distract myself for a while with food
or any other sensual pleasure
but there is still a loneliness deep inside
that no power on earth can measure

and some days are so lonely
it frightens others away
some days are so lonely
no one dares to stay
some days are so lonely
deeper than anyone will go
some days are so lonely
no one wants to know

i can turn on the tv and lose an hour
i can drink or do some drugs and lose a night
i can settle for a lighter kind of sharing
and have comfort for a while, but not delight
for the depths of caring know no limitations
life is pain and you can love it or you die
all the suffering you don't see is still out there
and if you don't feel it you've learned how to lie

remember boy,
you're gonna carry that weight
a long time

some days are so lonely
it frightens others away
some days are so lonely
no one dares to stay
some days are so lonely
deeper than anyone will go
some days are so lonely
no one wants to know

you can pretend you don't know
but the feeling has no where to go

who cares tonight

if you had the time would you care more than you do? in the loneliest moments does any message get through?... is it the folly of random genius or just the left side of right... i came here to wonder if you care tonight...

if you had the time
would you care more than you do?
in the loneliest moments
does any message get through?

is it the folly of random genius
or just the left side of right
i came here to wonder
if you care tonight

i wonder
who cares tonight

nobody has time

nobody has time, but the bored and the caring... and there is no one caring to let me know they care or they are bored enough to be here reading, or anywhere for that matter... nobody has time to share the reasons or rhymes... here i am... here i am right now at the time here in this rhyme and and then as if out of the blue i reveal myself to you if you only had the time... but nobody has time... nobody has time...

why be depressed?

in a good question asked in daily life is why choose, or why allow depression in a world that is so very depressed... not that i am asking, because this is a place for the bored and the caring, caring isn't happening, so boredom must be... both are easy paths to depression, but why bother... why bother caring, in fact, when there is no point to life... and without caring, why be depressed?...

feel free to present a different point of view...